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About Debbie Mirza
Debbie Mirza is a restorative coach, author, and singer/songwriter. She feels a deep calling to bring more peace, calm, and healing to the world through her music, books, and coaching.
In her coaching practice, she works with people who are coming out of relationships with covert narcissists. Her new book, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse explains the traits of the most insidious type of narcissist, how they affect you, and how to heal.
There is a free online quiz you can take on her website to see if you are with a covert narcissist.
You can also find support and information about covert narcissism on her YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCy3cZ8214WpwqtWouiDeq-w
There are also online courses on Debbie's website that help with healing after narcissistic abuse as well as how to parent when your ex is a covert narcissist.
Debbie's first book, The Safest Place Possible: A Guide to Healing and Transformation reveals practical steps to healing and developing a new relationship with yourself. In it the author shares stories from her own healing journey as well as tools she uses in her coaching practice.
She also creates guided meditations. The ones available on her website address specific issues. These are powerful tools that can help you find answers inside yourself as well as experiencing emotional healing.
Debbie has a love for music and singing. Her first album of healing and calming music called, “Soul Rising” and is now available on Amazon and Itunes. If you would like to receive the latest information and updates, there is a place to sign up for that on her website.
Learn more about Debbie’s coaching practice, books, healing music, online courses, and guided meditations at www.debbiemirza.com.
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Books By Debbie Mirza
Do you feel confused and exhausted by a relationship, and you can’t figure out why?
Do you feel like you can’t think straight, and the person in your life seems fine, so you wonder if maybe you are the problem?
Has someone mentioned you might be with a narcissist, or you wonder yourself, and when you research narcissism, they don’t seem to completely fit the description, although some of the traits do ring true?
The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist is the most comprehensive and helpful book on the topic of covert narcissism. Also available in Spanish as El Nacisista Pasivo Agresivo. Find the answers you are looking for. This book delivers:
- A list of traits of the covert narcissist and how they look like in daily life
- The differences between an overt and a covert narcissist
- A checklist to see if you are with a covert narcissist
- Real-life stories to illustrate what these traits look like
- Explanations of different covert techniques narcissists use to control and manipulate
- A chapter dedicated to what sex looks like with a covert narcissist
- Descriptions of covertly narcissistic parents Information on what it looks like to have a covertly narcissistic boss or co-worker
- A chapter on healing to help give you tools and hope for a beautiful future, free of toxic relationships.
You will see that you are not crazy, that your instincts are correct, and you will learn how to see through covert manipulation and control.
The most common description a survivor of this type of relationship will use is crazy-making. The emotional abuse and gaslighting makes you question your own view of reality, and sometimes your own sanity. You will know after reading this book if the person you are with is a covert narcissist, and your experience with them will begin to make sense for the first time.
When most people think of a narcissist, they think of someone who is grandiose, obviously self-absorbed, sees themself as superior to others, and throws fits of rage when they don’t get their way. But what if the narcissist is one of the nicest people you’ve ever met? What if they are a great listener, seem to care about others, or are a pillar of the community? What if they are the mother that volunteers at the school, the husband that your friends wish they had, the boss that your co-workers feel so lucky to work for? Parents, spouses, partners, bosses, and friends who are covert narcissists come across as the nicest people. They can be spiritual leaders, therapists, moms who bring over casseroles to needy people, and bosses who everyone loves.
A covert narcissist has the same traits of narcissism as the well-known overt type. The difference is when they control and manipulate, when they demean and devalue you, it is done in such a subtle way you don’t notice it.
This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship with a covert narcissist that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused. There are no visible scars with this form of abuse, and you are usually the only one that experiences their destructive and psychologically debilitating behavior.
Your physical body is affected as well. Many survivors have health issues, often chronic conditions that affect them for years after the relationship has ended.
It is common to have many symptoms of Complex PTSD, such as reliving traumatic experiences through flashbacks, feeling like you live in a continual state of high alert, being jumpy and sensitive to stimuli, having difficulty sleeping, feeling toxic guilt and shame, experiencing a lack of emotional regulation, and feeling like you are permanently damaged or worthless.
Cognitive dissonance wreaks havoc on your mind and body as you try to make sense of what you have been through.
Many find themselves becoming more reclusive after these relationships, feeling a new distrust of others and the world around them.
These relationships can bring us to depths of despair where we wonder if it is even possible to heal.
Healing after narcissistic abuse IS possible and this book will show you how.
Debbie Mirza’s first book in this series on narcissism, The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist explained the traits of a covert narcissist and what they look like in real life. In Worthy of Love, the highly anticipated follow up book, she focuses on how to recover after you realize you have been with a narcissist. How to heal, how to be free, and how to find peace.
In this book you will learn:
- The three phases of healing after narcissistic abuse
- The author’s own personal story of healing after experiencing several narcissists throughout her life
- Elements that are needed to heal
- How to trust yourself
- How to have healthy boundaries
- How to safeguard yourself from any future relationships with narcissists and toxic people
- Ways to strengthen the relationship you have with yourself
- Why narcissists abuse
- Some reasons we end up with narcissists
- How to deal with smear campaigns and flying monkeys
- Signs of Complex PTSD
- Ways to regulate your nervous system after years of trauma
- Simple, yet powerful techniques to heal that you can begin today
- Practices of self-care and self-love
- How to rewrite false messages you received about yourself from the narcissist
- And so much more
- There will be space for you to journal and answer questions that will help give you clarity, after all the confusion.
And finally, this book will explain why this important and courageous healing path you are on is your hero’s journey.
If you have lost yourself in an unhealthy or traumatic relationship and want to find your way back to who you really are, if you have had the rug pulled out from under you, if you are experiencing anxiety and fear, if you are unsure of your future, this is the book for you.
This book is both a memoir as well as an incredibly helpful guide to healing through transforming the relationship you have with yourself.
Debbie takes you through her own vulnerable journey of healing and restoration.
We hear a lot about self-love, but what does it actually look like in real life?
The author gives 21 practical exercises to use that will radically change your life.
The relationship we have with ourselves influences everything. It affects who we choose as partners, how we parent, how we are in our work, and how much we enjoy life.
This book will gently guide you to a new way of being with yourself that will transform areas in your life in ways you may not be able imagine or dream of right now.
You will feel loved and held as you make your way back to who you were meant to be in this world.
“I've read a lot of books on how to live a life of joy and peace, but this book surprised me. It is not a "how to be happy in 5 easy steps" manual. It is about how to come back to peace again and again in the middle of a REAL life. The author lets us into her own life in such a vulnerable way while filling each chapter with such depth. It truly felt like I was being given secret life lessons from a wise friend ahead of me in the journey.” – Amazon Review
“This book is a beautiful gift -- the author's stories WILL change you from the inside out. When I began reading, I was so struck by the kindness and the love in the author's words, like she was in the room with me, talking to me with such love. You will, too. This book will give you guidance and permission to be more loving and compassionate with yourself - to honor your emotions and to trust yourself deeply. The Safest Place Possible is an important book for our times - a time when love, compassion and greater self-awareness will help us heal individually and collectively.” – Amazon Review
This short eBook is a gentle guide that will help you recognize and rewrite false messages you received from narcissists or other toxic relationships.
When you are in a relationship with a narcissist, whether they are your parent, spouse, partner, co-worker, sibling, or friend, you are given false and damaging messages about who you are. There are many common messages that narcissists give to the people who love them. These can begin to form neural pathways in your brain that can eventually turn into beliefs about yourself that affect your self-esteem, self-worth, and life-force energy.
Over time you lose touch with the truth of who you are.
The good news is you can create new neural pathways of truth. The information, exploratory questions, and the meditation script in this eBook will help you do that.
This short but powerful eBook includes chapter sixteen from Debbie's book, Worthy of Love: A Gentle and Restorative Path to Healing After Narcissistic Abuse. In it you will read a list of messages many survivors have reported they received from both overt and covert narcissists. Some of these were spoken directly to them, while many were delivered in a more subtle and covert way. After that chapter, you will find a script to a meditation you can read through as often as you like. This meditation can also be found on Debbie Mirza's website (www.debbiemirza.com) where the author reads the words to you as a guided meditation.
After the meditation, in this ebook there will be other resources listed that help with healing after experiencing narcissistic abuse.
May all of this bring you more clarity, more peace, and more love for yourself. You deserve to be free and know the beautiful truth of who you really are.