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  • Why Men Hate Going to Church
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Customer reviews

4.5 out of 5 stars
4.5 out of 5
487 global ratings
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4 star
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Why Men Hate Going to Church

Why Men Hate Going to Church

byDavid Murrow
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Top positive review

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Luckie
5.0 out of 5 starsMurrow truly a bold, man of God - WE NEED MORE MEN LIKE THAT!
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on June 30, 2016
The fact that this book is written by someone who did not attend formal seminary but in his heart of hearts observed a problem and then took it to the next level in writing a book indicates a bold passion. We need more men like David. Murrow's points are bold, and striking as to why this phenomenon occurs. Some readers may have to put their FEELINGS aside and look at the main points. Any pastor, elder or related leader who has any wisdom and truly cares about growing/healing his church in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ needs to absorb the sometimes over-the-top humour and perhaps (for some) a tad crude language to see the light here. Wither the storm brothers. Would Jesus recognize his church today? Would He be welcomed in it? . Thank you brother David, you are truly a blessing from God and I pray that more men feel secure in being as bold as you are for His glory.
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Top critical review

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Christopher Miller
2.0 out of 5 starsReviewing: Why Men Hate Going to Church
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on January 5, 2012
I really wanted to like this book. When I picked it up, I had high expectations. Our church struggles to get guys involved. I was eager to learn about changing that.

I almost didn't finish it. In fact, had I not agreed to read it in its entity I probably would have dropped out in the middle. It's a bit like reading the Bible cover to cover. It all starts strong, but then around Numbers things go off the rails and the repetition just about kills it. Here's what I mean: he bashes churches that repeat the same praise chorus until everyone is in what he calls "a worship coma" but does practically the same thing as he repeats again and again all the things that churches do to repel men. I get it. churches turn men off. And not only is he nauseatingly repetitive, at times he comes across homophobic. I'm sure he doesn't mean to, but he's got to let up on how "gay" some church practices come across.

If you'd like to read the book here's my recommendation: read the first two chapters to get his point, understand where he is coming from, and to begin to wrestle with the need. Then skip to chapter 16. All the qualities, the redeeming characteristics, and the value of the book begin in chapter 16. Then you'll be able to read something helpful. There is some good stuff in there, but I wonder how many will have the patience to find it. I'm sure men won't.

I suppose the irony of all this is that the book itself is incredibly man unfriendly. All the things he says the church does wrong in regards to men are done in the book. The only way it could have been worse would be if each copy came with a crocheted book mark.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the [...] book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255
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From Canada

Luckie
5.0 out of 5 stars Murrow truly a bold, man of God - WE NEED MORE MEN LIKE THAT!
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on June 30, 2016
Verified Purchase
The fact that this book is written by someone who did not attend formal seminary but in his heart of hearts observed a problem and then took it to the next level in writing a book indicates a bold passion. We need more men like David. Murrow's points are bold, and striking as to why this phenomenon occurs. Some readers may have to put their FEELINGS aside and look at the main points. Any pastor, elder or related leader who has any wisdom and truly cares about growing/healing his church in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ needs to absorb the sometimes over-the-top humour and perhaps (for some) a tad crude language to see the light here. Wither the storm brothers. Would Jesus recognize his church today? Would He be welcomed in it? . Thank you brother David, you are truly a blessing from God and I pray that more men feel secure in being as bold as you are for His glory.
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Paul Cairns
4.0 out of 5 stars The book title says it all. I was surprised ...
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on February 8, 2017
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The book title says it all. I was surprised at how big a problem this really is. It's much more serious than simply an observation. Jesus Christ and the Gospel are being misrepresented by what passes for a church service these days.
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Dieter Lemke
5.0 out of 5 stars Why Men Hate Going to Church
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on February 26, 2018
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Many good points. Hope it works in smaller churches too, not just mega churches, for which the author has a secret admiration.?
Will recommend the book to leadership in my church. It may lead to some welcome changes, the Lord willing.
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Chris Dyck
5.0 out of 5 stars Thanks for having the balls to write an honest book that I, a man can actually use.
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on September 7, 2013
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I have grown really tired of trying to do better, so much that, I quit trying years ago.
The things you say in your book really hit me hard, in a good way and I can see why I gave up trying to be a man of God years ago.
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Mark Stone
5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Read ... Really
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on July 5, 2014
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I started reading and could not put it down ... and I don't ever read this kind of book. As the leader of mens ministries in my church this book challenged almost every belief I had about church and the way we do it.
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Rick Drury
5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for ALL church staff.
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on August 8, 2014
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Love this book. Have recommended it to many and will continue to do so. Should be a must read for churches and seminaries everywhere. Thank you David Murrow.
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blaireth
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on January 14, 2017
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Awesome!
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Steven Ibbotson
4.0 out of 5 stars Convincing & Challenging analysis
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on November 11, 2011
I remember hearing about this book when it was first published in 1995 (2005). There were some proponents who felt this book was long overdue. Others felt the book was simply a pathetic attempt to excuse male apathy in church. So, when the opportunity was given to review an updated version, I jumped in eager to read the arguments and examine their validity.

It is only fair to concede that this reader fits the small percentage of men who the church "connects" with - the verbal (able to teach/preach), studious (I read the book, right!), and sensitive (okay, many people would not describe me this way, but as it relates to the concepts in this book). Though I enjoy sports, due to physical limitations I cannot play, and thus resonate with the language Murrow suggests the church largely ignores that is men's preferred context/language. I can understand why male critics of this book would not agree with Murrow, because if you are a male church "star" (pastor/elder) and you agree with the thesis of the book, you are essentially admitting that you are a "feminine man."

The thesis of the book is that the main reason men hate church is because most aspects of congregational life are oriented towards predominantly female traits and styles. Part 1 seek to answer the question, "Where are the men?" and though not rich in statistics, the fact of the argument is really not up for debate.

Murrow actually begin arguing in chapter 5 (two chapters before part 2 of the book seemingly begins) that church culture and male culture are in constant structural (sytems) and functional (how things actually work out) conflict. From a one-sided view of Jesus (chapter 6) to the lovey-dovey worship songs (chapter 9) and many other symptoms, Murrow thoroughly points out how churches of the 20th century sent multiple messages to men that "church" is not the place you want to be talking about over the water-cooler on Monday morning. This part of the book is repetitive in some places, yet at the same time, it provides such ample evidence of how male culture is so diametrically opposed to most church language and activities, that one really can only cringe in embarassment.

Fortunately, part 3 offers some ten practical chapters "Calling the Church back to Men." By the end of the book, this reader found himself both convinced of the need for change to our church language and structures so that they are more "manly" as well as armed with some initial ideas for making these things happen.

This book was provided for free for review by Thomas Nelson publishers as part of the BookSneeze program.
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Marcel R Racine
5.0 out of 5 stars A reality and a guide to help get men interested ...
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on May 2, 2018
A reality and a guide to help get men interested in going back to church - The church needs to adjust and make it more interesting for men to want to go church AGAIN!
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Andrew Demoline
5.0 out of 5 stars "Why Men Hate Going to Church" by David Murrow
Reviewed in Canada 🇨🇦 on November 29, 2011
We all know that not all men hate going to church. I think we also all know that in most churches there are more women than men. Why is this? Where are the men? According to David Murrow we have made church an overly, and overtly, feminine experience and are now reaping the dubious rewards of such efforts. Through three sections Murrow makes the persuasive argument that we do have a problem, that it is a result of tailoring the church culture towards women, and that we can do something about it. Not only can we but we must, for without men churches slowly, but surely, perish. Or so argues Murrow; I happen to agree.

Why Men Hate Going to Church is an excellent book. It is provocative, well researched, and thoughtful. There were several moments during reading when I nearly gasped, in shock and delight, as Murrow refuses to pull any punches. In speaking of the feminization of worship, and how an 'ideal' worship service looks, Murrow concludes with these apt words: "After a round of applause, the satisfied worshippers return to their seats, emotionally and physically spent, bathed in the afterglow of heartfelt worship, ready to cuddle up with a message from the pastor."

Conclusion: 5 Stars. Recommended. If you are in a leadership position in a church then you should definitely read this book so that you can begin to see and implement necessary changes in your church. If you are not in church leadership, then you should still read this book; you need your eyes opened too.

Thanks to Thomas Nelson for providing this book for review.
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