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What I would give for a YA dystopia novel with a world that makes sense. The Union is set somewhere in the 4th millennium in what used to be the United States. The dystopian regime is called the “Union of Civilization” but it’s two regions divided by a Border. A few references suggest space travel is a thing but we don’t know anything about the rest of the world, much less the universe. The racial revolution that created the status quo happened either centuries ago or within three generations - sloppy editing makes that unclear.
Every place is a common noun: the Academy, the Citadel, the Farmlands, the Border etc. This lack of specificity betrays the lack of scope: it feels like this whole society is maybe a couple of hundred people in one small location. The parallels to the unplayable world of The Hunger Games should be obvious.
Why do I nitpick the setting? If the world makes sense then nothing that happens there does, either.
Namely, the characters do not behave as if they really live in the world they are placed in. The Union of Civilization is a race-swapped mix of the Confederacy and the Third Reich on steroids, and yes there is a plan for genocide, but the ruling elite of such a regime would not spend so much time and energy negotiating and relating with their inferiors. The story would have been about 90% shorter if it had made sense in the setting.
As a free monthly Prime book, I got what I paid for it.
I really liked the premise of this book, it could have been phenomenal. That's what is so disappointing.
To begin with, the writing is poor technically, especially the unreasonable number of sentence fragments scattered throughout. There are contradictory facts presented, for example, did the revolution take place a thousand years ago or three generations ago? Both answers are given in the text. I can't imagine that any half-decent editor would have let this sort of thing get by them.
There was no narrative that I could find, just a lot of things that happen, without a coherent common thread weaving them together. Then boom, out of nowhere, a plot point is solved by magic!
The pace was glacially slow, with more interest in descriptions of clothing than moving things along. I forced myself along for 30% of this book before I finally just couldn't go on.
I'd love to see this premise in the hands of a defter writer with a good editor.
I wanted to like this, and stuck with it longer than I expected to because the story moves along nicely, but the writing is just awful. Stilted dialog, weirdly offputting descriptions of the action and events, and clumsy phrasing kept jolting me out of the story and wishing that there was a copy editor somewhere to rescue this. i appreciate that the author clearly has an interesting story she wants to tell but it just creaks and wheezes along under the weird of the terrible prose. I gave up halfway through; it was just too painful to read.
I'm finding that this is a pretty frequent problem with books coming from Amazon's in-house publishing division. They seem to be going for volume over quality.
I read everything, so let me just tell you it takes a LOT of horrible writing for me not to finish a book. This was atrocious. I’ve read stories by my five year old that are better. My God. The premise is amazing. The concept fascinating. It has so much potential but it’s like half-written. Whole transitions missing, entire scenes shipped over… So confusing to follow that it’s almost impossible to track the story line. Just the absolute WORST. Do not waste your time.
no backgroud. no explanations , just poor writing, no real story. i read the whole book hoping it would get better,it didnt. many of the 1st reads are no longer worth reading, and the selection in prime is getting smaller. all this is to make me a subscriber to kindle unlimited which i do not intend to do.
Although the idea of a society in which Black people are in charge and White people are enslaved is intriguing, the author wasn't up to the task of making it real. The story line had its moments but there were too many holes in it.
Slow young adult story that inverts the races in an interesting way. Unfortunately, the story didn't match up too is interesting premise. Inverts, it works hard too teach a lesson and preach instead of pretty the characters like their own story. Over all, it felt very forced.